Anyway, when I flicked the light off last night and sat in bed, unable to sleep and with a whole host of thoughts bombarding my head, I stopped for a minute. I couldn't stop thinking about one thing: a quote I had been reading prior to going to bed.
"Eventually entire landscapes will be formed and re-formed by the relentless waters. In centuries to come, the spot on which I am sitting won’t even exist, never mind the problems which occupy my mind as I sit here."
As with every other quote I'm likely to be mentioning at the moment, this one comes from 'It's Not Me, It's You' (my favourite book at the moment). I texted it to my friend Jess this morning after reading something she wrote about being nervous about something she had to do today. But aside from spreading the sense those words make (to me, at least) about a bit, the quote really spoke to me.
Priorities, and so worries, will change with time. It was weird, because it was suddenly like everything in life made sense. Weeks and weeks of paranoia and depression and confusion, and suddenly everything seemed clear. Why? Because it's true. If we were to travel forwards in time and find me sitting on my bed, worrying about the same mundane burdens that my life is filled with now, I would be highly surprised.
There's something comforting in knowing that this is true - that this time next year I could be sitting in the same place, but with the worries that haunt my mind now non-existant. And it had some sort of unconscious yet profound impact on my day today, because nothing about it was bad. It was sunny, and warm, and nice. Liz and I sat outside the common room and had a picnic after giving a talk to some Y11s and discussed love and life and everything in between. I saw my English teacher, who reassured me about my coursework. I had a hilarious conversation with Ester that resulted in a strange feeling of motivation. And, just to add in a bit of weirdness, Jade spent Psychology quacking at me and Helen.
How can I complain about all of that? I can't. Not really. The metaphorical relentless waters constantly washing over my life have appear to have cleared the debris from the sand and the surface is neater now. There's really nothing to complain about in that...
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