The Truth

I was given the opportunity to be honest several times tonight and something inside me has just woken up.


College forced me to be positive. It forced me to start looking for the littlest things in my day and start appreciating them. I LOVE that I do that now, and it does make me happier. I don't doubt that. 


But you know what? There was once a time when I didn't need to force that. There was once a time when I could sit in a room and just cry for hours and there would be somebody there for me. The emotional wounds of failed friendships, unfair words and harsh realities were delicately covered with a bandage and checked up on regularly. I used to have certain people behind me, backing me all the way.

Not anymore.


But do you want to know something else? Somebody doesn't need to be there all day, all week, all month or all year to be there. The knowledge that somebody does care and does still want to know all about your life is so powerful. 

Wound-caring has become casual conversation. It has become honesty, transparency, reality. It has meant that tonight I listened to one the people I admire most in the world tell me things that nobody else would dare say about somebody I'm expected to respect. It meant that tonight, I also listened to one of the other people I admire most just take an interest and be interested.


Time and distance are never going to not be hard. Life is still going to be difficult when it feels like there's nobody. The difference now is that I know there are people who have given me the skills to move forward. And even though it's tough, it only hurts because of how blessed I was to have such incredible people in my life. I can't really complain about that, can I?...


Besos ♥ 
Rachel